From Epistles – First Series of Volume 5 of The Complete Works of Swami Vivekananda
Math, Belur
My Dear Shashi, (Swami Ramakrishnananda)
I am going with my mother to Rameswaram, that is all. I don’t know whether I shall go to Madras at all. If I go, it will be strictly private. My body and mind are completely worked out; I cannot stand a single person. I do not want anybody. I have neither the strength nor the money, nor the will to take up anybody with me. Bhaktas (devotees) of Guru Maharaj or not, it does not matter. It was very foolish of you even to ask such a question. Let me tell you again, I am more dead than alive, and strictly refuse to see anybody. If you cannot manage this, I don’t go to Madras. I have to become a bit selfish to save my body.
Let Yogin-Ma and others go their own way. I shall not take up any company in my present state of health.
Yours in love,
Vivekananda